LONG TIME

WOW it's been ages since I've last had a chance to post anything here, what with the summer holidays and now my chores and work there just hasn't been time, but I couldn't be happier!! Life is great, my Wife is slowly accepting her dominance over me and although we are still taking it slow she has accepted so much more than I ever dreamed she would Anyway just a quick post for now, hopefully there will be more next time and it wont be as long a wait

HER REPLY

So as I said in a reply to the previous post, my Wife's reply went to my spam folder and I didn't see it for hours! I was a nervous wreck in this time as I was terrified that she was annoyed with the e-mail and was refusing to talk to me. But when i found her reply I couldn't have been happier, it was very short, simply "looks great to me, not sure you have left enough hours in the day to complete all of your tasks".... She had agreed!!! Yes!!!! It was like a massive weight had been lifted from my shoulders, we actually managed to have a frank discussion about the whole thing that evening as well and she aired her concerns and I told her the truth about everything, it felt amazing to have this back and forth, there is nothing in the world like opening yourself to your loved one and having them accept you in a way you never EVER believed was possible. After the discussion we both felt much more relaxed about the whole thing, she still worries about being seen as bossy by other people but I explained that she doesn't HAVE to order me around, she can still ask nicely and say please, I still get the same sense of pleasure from helping her out without actually being ordered/told to do it, and I don't expect to do everything on my own, we are still very much a team, she is just the manager as well as a player. This seems to have allayed most of her fears for now and we are full steam ahead. She actually questioned how far she could push her power by asking how I would react if she told me to cancel my weekly friends night! I explained that I would be upset if I felt she was doing it for no reason at all, but if she just wanted to have me to herself for the evening that it would be no problem at all, this stems from her often expecting me to cancel my football games in the past which became a massive issue in our relationship as I felt she was doing it for no reason, and although I was still submissive it was hidden and as I was getting no feedback from the STEALTH submission it was causing all kinds of rifts and arguments. She decided that may well be a great punishment for me if I step out of line as the ones I had listed I get enjoyment from as well, I agreed that as a punishment that would probably have a bigger impact on me, boy she seems to be picking this up quick "gulp". ha ha

AGREEMENT

Still staying very current, I had a wish to put down in words how I felt our new relationship dynamic could be beneficial for both my Wife and I, so I sent her a long e-mail trying to explain everything, including how I felt and what she may get out of it, here i a copy of what I sent

Hi Honey

I just want to start this by saying how much I love and cherish you!! You are the most important person in the world to me and I can't put into words how grateful I am that we are together.

I've loved you since the moment I first saw you and if anything I love you even more now.

I wanted to write this because I want you to know that firstly, I am soooo happy that I have fully opened up to you and that you have accepted me, it was a very scary time for me when I decided to tell you my feelings and I know you found (and find) them strange, but you treated my feelings with love and respect and I will never forget that,

secondly, thank you for agreeing to try out my "game", it means so much to me that you have agreed to give this a go, I sincerely hope you are getting enough out of this relationship to actually enjoy it and for us to continue like this for the rest of our lives, but please know that if you are not enjoying it, I am so happy that you gave it a go anyway, we can stop at any time and that would not cause any problems between us,

thirdly, I wanted to put down here an idea of the type of things I would like to do for you and how this relationship should work out great not just for me but for you as well!!

fourthly, I want to remind you that this is a LOVING FEMALE LED RELATIONSHIP!!!, this is NOT FEMALE DOMINATION!!! there is a world of difference between the 2! the second is whips, chains, leather, bondage, and dog leads etc and while as a fantasy may be exciting, it is NOT what I want from our relationship! I don;t feel that either of us would enjoy the second relationship in the long term and I feel that it would be too weird and I wouldn't enjoy the change in our dynamic, for a start I'm not sure I could look you in the eyes properly after some of that and I don't want that for us. The FLR (female led relationship) is what it says, the wife leads the relationship and makes the decisions, the husband defers to wife in all matters but the wife does NOT look at him as lower than her ( a slave etc), the husband still has opinions thoughts and desires and can put all of these to the wife but it is ultimately her decision that counts.

An FLR is not about role play, or toys or games or outfits or anything like that, it is a lifestyle, a lifestyle that to be honest I believe we have fallen into a long time ago, which is why I feel that it would suit us, it is about the husband admitting that the most important thing to him is his wife and to actually put his money where his mouth is when he says "he woudl do anything for her!", how may times have you heard that? and how many times does it actually mean what it says?

fifthly, what do I get out of this?, I get an incredible sense of excitement EVERY time I do something for you, the satisfaction of doing a job properly that makes your day easier and makes you happier gives me an intense feeling of gratification.

Is it sexual? partly yes, I can't deny the erotic feelings I get when I'm doing these things, however it's more than just that, it makes me happy when you are happy, it's as simple as that.

Is sex involved? I hope so ;-) ha ha, as I said just now I do get aroused at times when I do things for you, but as I said the wife makes the decisions, this way there is no pressure to have sex because it's been "ages" or to wear that outfit because he will get cross.... no! the wife decides when it is time!!! This doesn;t mean you should go without, you can have it whenever you want this again is your decision. Now as I said it is partly sexual, and I can't deny that the longer I go without orgasm, the more excitement I feel by doing things for you, that coupled with the fact that I get super sensitive when denied for a while, which you seem to absolutely love, will obviously lead to times when I am denied release, this will make me both enjoy the submission more and also make me more "tingly" for your enjoyment, This feeling can be sped up drastically by helping you achieve yours whilst I have to wait, the sense of enjoyment is akin to a climax, it feels great!!! This is useful as post orgasm it is much more difficult to muster the correct levels of attention to your needs.

sixthly, what do you get out of it? Anything you want!!! Well that's the point isn't it? YOU MUST REMEMBER THIS IS ALL ABOUT YOU AND YOUR HAPPINESS!!! If you don't like some parts, stop doing them, if you like others bring them in. Please just communicate with me, I WILL NOT SULK OR GET MOODY, this is all about you! We go at your pace and do the things you want nothing more, nothing less!!

But as a small summary here are some of the things I hope that you will get out of this dynamic:

1) Less boring housework

2) A more attentive husband

3) Frequent (if not daily lol) massages (foot, back, all body, head, hands)

4) A house kept to the standards you would like to keep it to if you had the time and energy

5) A happy less moany and grumpy husband

6) Less stress

7) No pressure in regards to sex (meaning you can just enjoy it)

8) No pressure in regards outfits I want you to wear (this is against the rules discussed later)

9) Fun

10) Fun

11) Fun

oh and hopefully many MANY orgasms lol

So, to help with all of the above I've made a lttle crib sheet, just rules, tasks and potential punishments (note - punishments and rewards are at your discretion ie if it is fun for you,if you don't like it, don't do it, if you are not in the mood to do it, don't do it, or save it for another time lol)

RULES

1) I will defer to all of your decisions in all things

2) I will be honest with you at all times

3) I will offer my opinions and thoughts on things, you will then have the final decision, if you feel the opinions should not have been offered or are out of order you may deem a punishment necessary

4) I will not sulk or be grumpy unreasonably, obviously this is where the loving part of our relationship comes in, I trust you to decide when I am being unreasonable and you may punish accordingly

5) I will complete my tasks on time and to your satisfaction, not having enough time is not an acceptable excuse, I should have got up earlier or managed my time better

6) I will not pressure you for sex, to wear something, or to do something

7) I will be fun to be around at all times

8) I will not sulk because of family members and will not be off towards them (you know who i;m talking about)

9) I will ask permission if I want to organise something BEFORE ORGANISING IT!!!! again the loving part comes in here, I trust you to allow me to do my own things from time to time, when it suits you!!

10) I will not act or do anything in such a way as to bring attention to our dynamic and potentially embarass you because of it

This is not an exhaustive set of rules and you should add or remove or change them as you see fit

Any breaking of the rules may lead to a punishment, this is all at your discretion.

PUNISHMENTS

1) The dice game, roll 2 20 sided dice, 1 is the minimum number of days I have to wait for release, the second is how many times you get to before me!! If the numbers come up too small you can multiply them by 10 and if you decide that you want me to orgasm then you can either cancel the punishment or pause and recontinue or start again afterwards, it's up to you.

2) Nipple pinching (you seem to like this lol)

3) Spanking

4) Loss of brownie points

5) Loss of having people over or going out

This list again can be changed at any time and is at your total discretion if you like or dislike them

REWARDS

Rewards are not handed out for merely completing tasks on time, this is expected, they are handed out when you feel I have been worthy in whatever I was doing at the time

1) Brownie Points

My main reward is that we both enjoy the new dynamic and our happiness and love for each other reaches new levels

TASKS

DAILY

Coffee on your bedside on waking (Weekends and holidays only)

Tidy up house

Clean bathroom

Hoover downstairs

Make dinner

Wash up

WEEKLY

Wash sheets

Hoover stairs and upstairs

Wash towels

FORTNIGHTLY

Wash bedding

Mow the lawn and tidy garden

MONTHLY

Descale kettle

Treat pets

Bleach plugholes and drains

Fix lightbulbs

Clean behind tumble dryer

Clean the cars

Any further tasks please let me know

This is just a list of the routine tasks, anything else is at your discretion, any help with the tasks is at your discretion and will be appreciated.

Failure to complete any task on time or to your satisfaction may lead to a punishment.

BROWNIE POINTS

This system is exactly as we have it now, there is no actual keeping of points as such, just a feeling that I have earned enough for a particular reward, these are obviously special rewards and require a lot of good behaviour and would be something like;

1) You wearing sexy underwear/outfit

2) Orgasm for me! YAY!! lol

Anyway that's it for now, hope it's OK, please remember this is all about having fun, and for you to be comfortable in the knowledge that you can tell me your thoughts and feelings about this (good or bad) without and recrimination or sulking or even pushing from me.

I love you honey, I love you so much I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR YOU

3 IS THE MAGIC NUMBER

Ok so I need to make a leap in time to mention last weekend, because it was awesome !!! :-)

So on the Friday, my wife was going out with a friend for the day and I was left with the kids, as they had also planned on a meal in the evening I also made sure that the house was in an acceptable condition for them to come back.

As I was cleaning the house and looking after the kids I had a great feeling of submission, even though my wife hadn't expressly left me tasks to complete I still felt very good about it.

On the Saturday she went to a party for an old friend, when she returned she was nicely drunk and we sat on the sofa talking about the party etc, we got onto the subject of my submission and discussed some things that we like and dislike, she explained that her concept of a female led relationship stemmed from femdom stories etc and was very against the idea of "leading me around on a leash!!"" I explained the difference between a loving female led relationship and femdom and told her how I was not into the extreme side of the relationship as I felt it would affect the dynamic we have. I think this all put her at ease and she began to accept how the whole thing may work for her as well as for me, she did say how much she didn;t like the idea of coming across as bossy and lazy and I told her I would do everything i can not to let this happen.

We talked about how much I enjoy pleasuring her and how much excitement i get from that even though I don't always get to oragasm, I explained how the waiting made me feel great and more submissive to her, which she accepted after a while, we discussed having sex that evening but decided that she was way too drunk to actually enjoy it properly. However the conversation must have excited her more that I thought because after getting into bed we began kissing and she teased me gently for a while before I brought her to orgasm using my fingers.

Normally my wife can only manage 1 orgasm but at times we have managed 2, this was 1 of those times, amazingly considering my wife was drunk, I managed to bring her to orgasm using my tongue and mouth. At this point I was rock hard and quivering and in a complete state of bliss, my wife was also very happy and was in an amazing mood as the second orgasm was even bigger than the first, she again began teasing me, this again had the effect of arousing her and, even though it too a long time, I bought her to an orgasm for a third time!!! I have never ever felt more aroused and happy, we fell asleep with me cuddling up close to my wife and slept soundly. The sense of arousal just got stronger and stronger as the days passed.

What a weekend!!!!

BACKGROUND cont.

as i said before I never had many girlfriends, and the submissive side of my being was less and less fulfilled, there were a couple of girls who allowed me to be myself, but only one of them actually got any enjoyment out of it herself, and we were not destined to be together. But still I had my imagination, the internet and books lol.

Then one night I met my wife to be!!! Talk about thunderstruck, she was fantastic, she looked stunning and had an incredible sense of humour. I fell for her instantly, and as she has since told me she felt the same, unfortunately I was with someone else!

I had been unhappy in this relationship for some time already and this gave me the reason to finish it before it went too far, the first time I risked everything for my wife and opening up told her exactly how I felt for her. Obviously my feelings were returned and we got together and everything was great.....

Background

So a little background as promised

I guess I've always been submissive, at least as far back as I can remember, the idea has always intrigued me. I assume it can be traced back to my older next door neighbour when I was young. She was always taking charge and telling me what to do, and I must say that I remember enjoying doing what she said. I guess that's also where the start of my fantasies of being humiliated started as well., whilst there was nothing sexual (we were way too young) she enjoyed getting me to do things that humiliated me, and that feeling seems to have stuck with me throughout my life.

Growing up I was always interested in the "kinkier" sides of sex, as a teenager books of a sexual nature became available, the part that sticks in my mind is of a naked woman being covered in eggs and having her picture taken in a studio and the heat from the lights began cooking the eggs. The thought of her laying there with the slimy egg juice all over her really excited me and then the idea of the textures changing in the heat.... well those thoughts excite me now as much as they did then.

I was never any good with the ladies (lol) so I had no chance to explore these feelings with anyone else, as I got older I discovered masturbation and managed to get my "kinky" kicks by imagining I was being ordered to do things, one game I remember playing a lot. On the way home from nightclubs (after many drinks) I would play this game, the rules were simple, as I walked down the street I had to get from 1 street lamp to the next before a car passed, I wasn't allowed to speed up or slow down just walk along at the same pace, if I failed then I would have to unzip my fly, then the game carried on again to the next street lamp, if I made it then I could zip up otherwise I would have to take my cock out and carry on again. Once out if I failed again I had to start stroking (whilst walking), this game could go on for quite some time depending in traffic and the distance between lights so it hit all my buttons, submissive, humiliation, denial, great fun, and the game could be changed depending on my moods as well. Obviously a dangerous game to play and I wouldn't recommend it to anyone, I was lucky and never actually got caught.

New Blog

Hi there.

I've been reading blogs about submissive husbands for a while now, I've found them interesting, arousing, informative and incredibly helpful. I decided to start my own blog for 2 reasons; first, for other people to read and hopefully enjoy, and secondly, and most importantly, to help me organise my thoughts and frustrations, my hope is that this will enable me to explore my feelings properly and to hopefully help me in the future.

My posts will probably be short and infrequent but I'm hoping that in putting my thoughts down in words it will help me work through them.

Please feel free to post comments, I look forward to chatting with like minded people.

Well that's the intro done and the blog is now out there so to speak, will post soon with some background about my relationship with my wonderful wife